By - The Reporter
On - 27 OCT 2016
STAFF REPORT
"It takes a village to raise a child[e]."
- African proverb
Learning is a lifelong endeavour, and just because a fledgling is fully powered does not mean that they have reached the pinnacle of their worth. Many life lessons are learned as we age and gain perspective; expecting perfection once all powers are acquired is senseless. Sure, a fully powered vampire may know the nitty gritty of their abilities in the city, but social know-how? That’s a whole other beast.Wisdom takes time to achieve, as do many of the qualities expected from hardworking citizens. Actions have consequences, and it is through those consequences that we learn what is and is not acceptable. Mentors have the responsibility of explaining those consequences, but many childer/students don’t heed the words or their advisers and find themselves learning the hard way: paying with blood. Or so it once was.
Nowadays it seems that some of the best - and yet most difficult - lessons to learn are left out of the education of our younger citizens out of fear that allowing a friend, family, or clan member to take their licks will leave them less for it - or leave their sire/leader with one less follower. In the absence of these lessons under the protection of a large family or clan, vampires grow up with a lack of accountability. This is a problem with not only our fledglings, but those who've grown up without really growing up.
The topic of whether or not a childe should be fully powered before siring has been a controversial one for years [1],[2], and the argument is unlikely to ebb and die anytime soon. Many and varied attempts to impose a certain set of social norms on the subject have failed, some more spectacularly than others. There are pros and cons to either side of the argument, but ultimately, it remains a choice made between sire and childe. Everyone is different, and what works well for one may not well serve another. Regardless of when someone is sired, most would agree that a sire's role is to guide their childer. What means and methods they choose is up to the individual sire.
A mentor does not necessarily have to be a sire[3], but the reverse is not necessarily true, especially where younger members of our community are concerned. Older, more learned members of the community may choose to sire under someone for whatever reason, but when it comes to a fledgling vampire, there is a certain level of mentoring expected from the sire. When these fledglings misbehave, if they have the 'right' connections, they are often protected from the repercussions of their actions by clan, family, or future family while those without affiliation are held accountable for... anything and everything[4].
While not a timely example, Shakeer’s situation in June 2015 is a perfect case study[5]. While a student of the Republic of Ravenblack, Shakeer flouted the clan’s rules and made enemies outside the clan. Even though she, a fledgling, had arguably earned a good slap, many refrained until she was removed from The Republic, and zeroed by Vex. Then, those myriad issues came to light, and only then did it become open season. Shakeer began being attacked by various persons, all for different reasons. Elizabeth said it best: "No, I wouldn't let [Jessie_Love] kill you because you were still in RoR and they would have been obligated to go after Jessie since you were their student." [6]. Ultimately, RoR did something about her behaviour, but not until a point had been reached where they’d run out of the infinite patience the clan seems to display.
Our society is formed on the basis of maintaining and upholding a certain set of social norms. These vary from person to person, and group to group, but in general, we have unspoken, unwritten rules in our city regarding resting, respect for the fallen, respect for elders, spying, and a wide range of other things. Some clans and families have more detailed written rules and guidelines. All these things – collectively our social norms and standards - are based upon the principle that we will uphold them should they be violated.
Lately, however, it would seem this collective action has fallen flat on many levels. There have been a few sires/families/clans that have taken responsibility for their people's misbehaviour [7], but by an large, entities avoid policing their own with vials[8]. The lack of accountability that isn't just seen in fledglings. Where individual sires protect their childer from their own mistakes and fail to teach respect, those childer move on in life and may find themselves in a clan or family able to protect them. What happens when the clan/family refuses to hold that member accountable for poor behaviour?
"You attack my family or friends or clan, in general, My People [sic], there will be a response and many know me and my own not to put up with attacks," said Malkavian, implying that any attack against his family would be retaliated against, regardless of the reason for the attack[9]. Although the statement was made by Malkavian, it's quite obvious that this sentiment is shared by many in the city. An eye for an eye, so to speak. Or, if protecting a family/clan member from their own misbehaviour, an eye for a fuck-you-even-though-you-lost-an-eye.
It's easy to see why a leader (family or clan) would choose to take this road: you keep your members happy, you keep your membership roster nicely padded. But is it worth it?
Sadly, this mentality is deleterious. We are all accountable for our own actions, but a lack of accountability can clearly be seen in many of the 'newer' generation. Really, it's no wonder. In an era where people are protected based on who they know or where they fit into the societal scaffolding, what those people do matters less. Even if someone unaffiliated would never get away with the same. Over time, this mentality has permeated our society, has bled through generations. It's easy for a leader to forgive a close friend, a lover, a childe, a long time clan member for a given offence, but we as a society are lesser for it.
Leaders should be holding their people accountable for the troubles they cause, rather than letting it fly and offering protection when it comes back to bite them in the ass. If we as a community want a return to a more respectful society, we need to hold accountable not only our youngest, but also our oldest, our peers, our childer, our sires, our clanmates, and clan members. We need to return to a society where ideals matter more than numbers padding a membership roster. Without strong core values, what truly differentiates the groups within this city? What makes them unique and worth fighting for? What should we as a society hold dear? Should we be holding even our loved ones accountable? Should we be protecting people based on who they know, or should we really be considering what they've done?
Author's note: this piece was inspired by Lessons Learned by Anonymous, Mentoring: The 'no strings' way. by Nemesis and Bullying or Teaching? by Elisha.
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[1] petit_prince's laundry list of zeroings (both by him and done to him)
[2] Zeroings of fledglings for doing things outside "the norm":
[1] | [2] | [3] | [4] | [5] | [6]
[3] Mentoring: The 'no strings' way. by Nemesis
[4] Zeroings of underpowered or unaffiliated persons for various reasons (no particular order):
[1] | [2] |[3] | [4] | [5] | [6] | [7] | [8] | [9] | [10] | ... I could go on...
[5] Shakeer, Bloodless
[6] Elizabeth, Shakeer, Bloodless
[7] Instances of families/clans policing their own:
[1] | [2]/[3] | [4] | [5] | [6]
[8] Which is not to say members of factions aren't reprimanded privately for misbehaving, just that we do not see as much bloodshed for a faux pas within groups as we do towards those without affiliation.
[9] Malkavian, Bullying or Teaching?. The intent of using this particular quote is not to call out any one group or person; this comment merely served to illustrate a notion with which many seem to agree.